


Where are you going? Where have you been?

by Whatnotwhynot



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Autism Spectrum, Canon, Fallen Angels, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Samandriel (Supernatural), M/M, Neurodiversity, Not Canon Compliant, Samandriel (Supernatural) Lives
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-11-22 10:08:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20872451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whatnotwhynot/pseuds/Whatnotwhynot
Summary: Samandriel wakes up just on the outskirts of Ridgemont, Ohio with the taste of blood, dirt, and betrayal on his tongue.[Season 8 + 9]





	Where are you going? Where have you been?

_"He gave me wings when I asked for fire. 'Rise not burn' he whispered."_

_\- Sara Singhal_

_~_♡~

His name is Alfred, but most of his friends call him Alfie. He is sixteen, and has a quick, compulsive habit of craning his head back to break eye contact. "Look me in the eyes when I'm talking to you, son." His dad would say, with a heavy alcoholic slur to his words. "What're you _retarded?_" The man smells like a hard days work, two packs of low end cigarettes, and an unmeasured amount of liquor.

  
"Leave him alone Richie," His mom says, with a prim voice. The pink robe she wears disheveled, just like her thin blonde hair. Her eyes are heavy, and sunken in, just like her cheeks. Alfie looks over at his pair of twin sisters, both ten, named Bernadette and Elowen ('Birdie' and 'Winnie'). They peer together at the scene unfolding in the kitchen, from atop the stairs. Their light brown hair is folded over their shoulders as their lips go tight with apprehension.

"Who was talkin' to you ya' skank?"

"Richie you're drunk." His mom chimed with a no nonsense type tone. Her freshly manicured nails tap on the kitchen door frame.

"No, I'm not." The man proclaims. "I, had one drink. You always.... Do this shit."

"I always do this shit cause, you're always drunk!"

Alfie gathers the twins from atop the stairs, makes them brush their teeth, and together they head into their shared bedroom.

~~

Samandriel comes to Alfie in a dream.

The first time Alfie sees Samandriel He looks like that old stray Alfie used to have, before dad shot it between the eyes._ "Hi,"_ The dog greets. Which Alfie thinks is silly, cause dogs don't talk.

_"A talking dog,"_ Alfie laughs like he just made the funniest joke. The dog nudges Alfie with his wet nose, and Alfie smiles. _"Is this a Dream?"_ Dreams are so scary, cold, very lonely, but this one isn't. Alfie looks at his clean, plaid pajamas, and the cloudless sky, and golden wheatfield. Alfie reaches behind the dog's ear to scratch. _"This one is nice. No dad drinks, No cold hands. I hate hands."_

_"Do you like the dream? I made it myself!"_ The dog sounds proud. His tongue darts from his mouth, making appreciative pants. Alfie loves the dream, but he doesn't know how to convey that in words, so he pets the dog with love. _"__I'm__ glad you like it Alfie."_ Alfie nods. "_Now. Tell me, Alfie can you help me?" _The dog lays down next to Alfie in the wheat field, watching as the birds fly to unknown territory beyond the horizon.

  
Alfie thinks about Samandriel's question, and smiles.

"_Help with wha__\---"_

The alarm wakes him up.

~~

His name is Alfred, but most of his friends call him Alfie. He is sixteen and has a quick, complusive habit of counting. He likes counting, and he likes numbers. Numbers never change. Numbers are everything people aren't. One before two, three after four. A continuous process. Alfie counts the number of stairs leading up to the front of St. Louis Highschool, then he counts the number of steps it takes from the double doors at the entrance to Ms. Tarins classroom. The wide set, happy woman, greets Alfie at the door, and hands him a worksheet to do. He tells her how she smells like laundry soap with a big smile.

Alfie likes laundry soap.

Alfie finishes the worksheet in two hundred and forty seconds, and Alfie counts how many times Alice Young says "rad" and "like" in her conversation with Justin Jones.

~~

The mall is loud, and Alfie hates when it's loud, but it's imperative that after school on Tuesdays and Fridays Alfie goes home, eats whatever is available in the fridge (which isn't much) puts on his Wiener Hut uniform and goes to work from five to nine.

Today is slow though, and Alfie has a really bad headache. He holds his temples with a pained gasp. His boss, Miss Clarice, puts a comforting hand on the teen's shoulder, and offers him some help. "Honey, you could lay down in the back if you want?" Alfie pulls away from her hands screaming that his skin is melting. Her touch is gentle, comforting to anyone else. But Alfie isn't anyone else, and it hurts him. It burns so badly. "Sorry, I forgot sweetness." She has a guilty expression on her face. "Want to go lay down for a second?"

"I have to stay at the cash register."

"Nevermind that Alfie, now go lay down now. Ease up."

It takes a few mintues for Alfie to get comfortable in the back, and a few more minutes for Alfie to fall asleep, but when he does it feels like Heaven.

~~

Samandriel seems more insistent the second time around.

In front of Alfie is his mom, before the incident. With thick blonde hair, and sparkling blue eyes. Her hair is curled, and fell over her shoulders in a waterfall of blonde. She wears a white dress with gold embroidery, looking like a goddess underneath the sunlight. Alfie holds his arms out to her, she steps into his hug. Alfie embraces her warmth, happy her touch doesn't burn him. Alfie inhales. She smells like apples, and peach. Her smile is bright and comforting.

"_Alfie. My name is Samandriel. I am an angel of the lord, and I need your help._" The angel whispers into Alfie's shoulder.

"_An angel? You need help?"_ Alfie's voice is low like he's saying a secret. She must be an angel, because her touch doesn't sting. It doesn't feel bad, or hurt, and everyone's touches are _Bad bad. __Hurt_.

"_Yes_." Samandriel pulls away, and takes the boy's hands in his own. The angel is gentle with it's touch. "_Will you help?"_

_"Me? I can help?" _Alfie sounds shocked.

_"Yes. Alfie. In order to walk on earth _ _I_ _ need a body, _ _I_ _ need you. I promise no harm shall come upon you while _ _I_ _ am using your vessel."_

_"But... I have to cook dinner, and watch Crystal Pals with my sister after work, we always watch Crystal Pals after work on Tuesday, and __I_ _always__ cook dinner._"

The angel smiles warmly again.

"_I will have you back just in time. I promise."_ Samandriel is honest when he says this, believing his words himself. Alfie looks up in thought, before nodding slowly, and wrapping his arms around the Angel's waist laying his head down on it's chest.

"I like you, you don't burn, I will help."

_"Thank you," _Samandriel whispers in relief.

~~

Samandriel admires his new body; At the same time Miss Clarice walks In, and gives him a complex, worried look. "Oh, Alfie, Honey you feelin' any better?" Samandriel looks up at the dark skinned woman, puzzled as to what to say. The angel gets up, staring at the woman with clinical curiosity. He places a warm hand on her shoulder, and offers a delicate smile. Miss Clarice looks shaken by this.

"Goodbye," Samandriel calls out, leaving the woman to stand there in the middle of the food court with a wild expression. The once mellow area is now being rushed with people wanting to order food. Miss Clarice panics.

"Alfie! _Where are you going?_ Please come back over here." A terrible feeling hits the woman all at once. "At least Let me call someone to come get you!"

The teenager disappears from her line of sight, a lump forms in her throat which she forces herself to swallow. A terrible feeling a dread settles in her gut.

~~

It takes four days for Alfie's parents to file a missing person's report, and six more days for the police to actually start a search. By then Alfie (and Samandriel) were dead.

Despite how grim the statistics are, Winnie waits by the door for her brother everyday.

**Author's Note:**

> I have no Idea why i wrote this. I joined the fandom late and immediately felt a stab in my heart when Samandriel died. I was inspired by a short story where are you going? Where have you been? By Joyce Carol Oates. 
> 
> Unbetaed, and unedited all mistakes are my own 
> 
> This beginning prologue really kicked my butt.


End file.
